79 Is the New Fat

Funny how the mind works...

For years, when I hit 85kg I’d think:

“Opps. You’re getting fat Jerry. Pay more attention to that.”

And the inevitable discipline would be initiated until I was down to a decent 83kg.

Now my trigger is 79kg. That’s my new fat.

It’s taken a loooooong time to get there. Along the way I discovered it’s most NOT about what I eat – I haven’t actually changed much of that. I still have two eggs on toast. By one toast now, not two.

Instead, my process has been more about: how I eat; how I think about eating; how I make decisions around eating.

To teachers of Alexander's discovery this should sound familiar!

Dieting is usually about ‘what’, just like posture. Don't eat this, do eat that – be good. Posture is the same. Stand like this, don’t sit like this – be good. Both are impossible impositions on an underlying behaviour that resists all attempts to be bossed about.

As the joke goes: “Oh yes, this is wonderful diet! I’ve been doing it for years.” The whole concept is suspicious. I am going on a diet. I am going to New York. OK. After the diet/New York – then what? Home again. Back to being fat, eating garbage and waiting for the next trigger to diet again.

Now, triggers are good.

All behavioural change is triggered off first. By an accident, by an emergency, by unpleasantness. This is what gets people into “dieting” or “correcting their posture”. That’s good. As Charles Duhigg points out in his mind opening book The Power of Habit, triggers can’t be changed – it’s wired in. The reward can’t be changed either – you gotta get thinner. The scales have to say so, or there’s no joy, no satisfaction. The reward stays the same.

So what’s left to change?

Your how. Your process inbetween your trigger and your reward. What’s the best way to do that?

By focusing on what you do/eat?

Or by focusing on how you do/eat?

In my journey over the last two years, I’ve been focusing on how I eat, not what I eat. And teachers of Alexander's discovery do the same in lessons. And actually, it’s true of everything. How is the place where behaviour exists.

My first job was to decide to eat when I was hungry, nothing else. That threw up a whole lot of puzzles – how to you time being hungry with the calendar of life?

“Wait. I can’t go to your dinner party. I am not hungry.”

Really? No. That isn’t going to work. How becomes the issue, and all the behaviour, the decisions, the planning starts to come under review. And of course when that happens, patterns emerge. I eat sugar when I’m hungry, just an hour before your dinner party. Stupid.

Three questions:

1. How do you move?
2. How do you eat?
3. How do you do business?

In my experience, Alexander Technique teachers know a lot about the first, quite a bit about the second, and almost nothing about the third. Which is really weird when you think about it. How can eat if you don’t make a living? How can you move freely when you’re stressed about surviving?

If you want to know more about how you go about your business, sign up below for my free 12 step seminar below. It’s a journey into how, not what. Go for it. (And we are starting a new online 60 Day course from March 1st. Email ATSDirector Peter Jacobson to find out more.