DeepThinking - Loneliness

Back in Japan and missing my children already. What is that lonely feeling? I seem to notice it first thing in the morning, as I go through my morning routine. I think of them, I miss them, I feel lonely. It's a longing for something, and it appears to be outside of me. My kids: that can solve my lowliness right? Can that be real? As a Buddhist I know it is delusional thinking to seek something "out there" to solve the problem of my "right here" emotions. Katie puts it this way: "When you're over there with them, there's no-one home for you." But I feel, um - guilty almost when I think the thought: "I do not miss my children." It's like I have it in my head that: loving them = missing them - OR - I don't miss people I don't love = if I don't miss them, I don't love them. All twisted and crazy I am sure, but whoever said emotions were logical? That's why I love them - I have little control. When I am up, I love the ride - when I go low, I struggle for air. The rhythms of life. Just like the weather. Nothing wrong. It's also why having a life mission is important for me - it makes sense of the nonsense.