My Dinner Date with Marj

I was finally at my dinner date with Marj, my 97-year-old Alexander teacher, who was sharper than anyone I knew.

At our dinner, I slowly realised she had invited me there as part of an unspoken zen-like right-of-passage around my dog-like eating behaviour.

It was my test, my moment of transformation.

It was January 1987. 

Marj and I were sitting in one of Sydney’s classier restaurants eating together. My unspoken assignment was to finish my meal at the same time as Marj finished hers.

Marj had now been eating for over an hour. All that time, I am painstakingly watching her plate, then calibrating my eating to finish my meal with hers. 

I am succeeding and proud that I managed it. I gave a final look at Marj’s calculate how many more mouthfuls Marj had left. I thought, maybe two or three…

So I cut my baby carrot into three parts, then put the first part on my folk as I glanced over to Marj’s plate again…

WHAT?!

All the food on Marj’s plate was gone.

Yea! 

I realised I could finish the rest of my baby carrot. So instead of eating what I had prepared, I hurried pierced the two other little carrot slices and added them to my folk.

Just as I as bring the folk up to my mouth, Marj leaned over and pointed to me:

“Don’t you rush.”

“RUSH?” I blurted out, “RUSH! - I’ve been eating for over an hour!”

“I know,” she replied, “I’ve been watching you.”

Then I realised she had deliberately tricked me!

By quickly eating up the remainder of her meal the second after I checked it - she set up a trap, and I fell right into it.

My behaviour was so stark and clear to me. My “rushing to eat” tendency was laid bare for me to experience consciously – just as Marj intended.

***

Change involves actions that rub against the behaviours of a lifetime. 

You’ll change when:

1. The pain of staying the same is more than the pain of changing; or
2. You surrender to a teacher you admit knows more about you than you do.

Change involves humility. 

Without that, a teacher can do nothing for you.

When your ego is boss, you project your past into your future and keep having the same problems, the same obstacles. You cannot discover what is hidden to you. However, with humility, a great teacher can open doors that you didn’t know were locked.

This is why you need guides.

With a guide, you can emerge out of your hamster wheel; but without a guide, your life might become like a hampster’s, running inside a wheel - spending a lot of time, energy and willpower to get nowhere, to end up every time exactly where you started.

Think of relationships, diets, getting fit and addictions.

I don’t profess to have the same deep wisdom that Marj imparted to others – but as I look back, I know my work as a teacher of Alexander’s Discovery was transformed. I have created two related courses that communicate the journey that is available for you.

To read more about it and sign up – go to the link below:

https://bodychance.mykajabi.com/store/TGFBWut4/