Never Give Up, Then Die in Your Sleep

Recently I was staring at my Mac’s screen, listening to a distressed man wonder if he had got it all wrong for the last 10 months. He had joined ATSuccess Pro to discover how he could share the work with an aged community living in close proximity to his home.

It took a while for me to recognize the fact that this man was himself in his 80’s!

He did not consider himself old, or even part of the very community he wanted to help. These were disabled people – he was not. They people were in pain, had balance issues, and lacked the requisite knowledge to help themselves. He did not.

It reminded me of a wonderful story my 68 year old mother-in-law told me about her mother. They had arrived together at a country train station to be confronted by a tall row of steps leading to the platform. Her mother quickly snatched away her suitcase from her saying:

“Let me carry that!”

She was 100 years old at the time!

She didn’t consider herself old or incapable, instead she was worried about her frail 68 year old daughter! When I think of her, I think of Don, the man I was listening to that day. And I smile.

Don died just a day ago. In his sleep – totally unexpected.

And yet – is death ever unexpected? I wonder why we are surprised when someone dies – did we really think people will live forever?

Death is as natural as life, and it comes to everyone without prejudice. The question is never “if I am going to die…,” it is: “how am I going to die?”

I would be proud to die the way Donald Higdon left this world.

There was no agony, no long drawn out dance to death (as far as I know). He was here one day pursuing his dreams, and the next day he was gone. Wow. I’d love to go like that.

He simply wasn’t giving in to “being old”

He was living as if he was starting out, damn it – he was just starting out. That crabby man in my screen was owning up to the fact that his efforts over the last 10 months with his niche had not produced the results that merited the time and effort he had put in. And so he decided to start again!

When I look at Don, I perceive a man who never gives up.

He was willing to start again. And again. And again. I have no real knowledge of his long life – this is not his obituary – I only knew the man I met 14 months ago.

And I’d love to be that man when I am in my 80s. Whenever my death comes, I want to be caught doing what Don was caught doing – starting over again!

Of course Don was not overjoyed at the idea of starting over – who would be? – and yet he had the courage to face the truth and re-decide his path. I love people who live that way, and as a model for that he will endure in my mind - he lives on in his death.

I don’t know what “a retirement” looks like, and I don’t think Don did either.

And if you are enjoying what you do in life, neither will you!