Unedited Kyoko Miyoshi

Kyoko Miyoshi is one of my Japanese students in CareerThinking – the optional course I personally run in for my students in Tokyo. It was to develop this course that I first began blogging in September, 2012. Recently I sent out an email asking people to tell me their story. Kyoko, although her first language is not English, spent a long time to prepare her reply. I think you will find this a delightful read: honest, deep and uniquely Japanese in the way her thoughts flow to words. Enjoy – in fact, now I am off to teach Kyoko now for Step 2 in the course, which I will also start here next month, about Niches... *** My Passion is to be Instruments of Insight. Thank you Jeremy for giving me this big good chance. The most interest is how some insight will change to be something practical which can be shared with many people. And I will be very glad if many people enjoy seeing growing story of such a pre-idea. Because of my English problem, it's so long and hard to read (I’m sorry). Please change them briefly as you like and ask any question. From the beginning of this year I feel my life is developing very fast. I had always lived only following my insight. I happened to remember the word “Alexander Technique” on this January. Maybe it is time. I am so enjoying to see the story developing. 1) Recent two big “results” connected what I learnt on your course: a) Yuka-san’s lesson on March 20, “witness the starting point of my movie.” I am no good to find appropriate words to tell my image or to make a good logical explanation. So on the day I asked Yuka-san to practice to answer some questions from a person. When I stayed being at a loss for an answer, Yuka-san asked me “What happen in you now?” Then I could witness that before I answer and see a reaction of the person I already started my bad story in my head and get ability to slow down the story film and finally stop my story before it start. After that I am not involved in my story and easier to see the real world. b) Kimiko-san’s lesson on April 6, “go through to the outside world” Practice to sit on a chair. When Kimiko-san adjusting my cervical vertebrae, she said to me to see the outside world. It worked a trigger to let me fall into big fear. Usually I often close my eyes, especially to feel my body. On the day I found it means to shut out the outside world, because it is too fearful to have any connection with the outside world. But probably the time has come. I felt big fear and stayed in the fear. Then I saw a pearl film cocoon around me separating me from the outside world. After some minutes I go through the pearl film and be able to connect with the outside world. After that I don’t feel big fear and feel ease to communicate with people. 2) A story about my practice… A personal insight into how I’ve changed my thinking. a) My practical career… My practical career is worker of travel agent, secretary of a small trading company, qualified worker of a professional office of social insurance & personnel management over 10 years and now accountant & administration of ten thousands members NGO about Nature experience over 10 years. Each time I have been efficient enough and loved my job. But also, I always feel some difficulties about relationship with people from childhood. b) Hidden difficulties and my way to inquire? Maybe it is not so unusual. Probably a little different point of me is I thought that first of all I have to change myself by myself alone. (I don’t understand why? But I did so.) Although I kept my job generally, but in my head I retired to my mind and after some years I began mountaineering (rock climbing, water climbing, mountain skiing, and so on) because it seemed the best way to confront myself and feel ease to communicate with the nature instead of people. Also I usually find a book fit to my mental condition each time and read them repeatedly, ten time twenty times thirty times… often one book kept a few years. After almost fifteen years retreat (it is almost 10 years ago), I felt OK to back to the human world and started to join some kind of workshop like process work and to do yoga, Aikido, meditation, and so on. Doing these activities I noticed body and mind are linked and I cannot deceive my body. c) What I have been doing in my mind for so long years? Confront to my mind, make me feel positive to my existence, accept myself. Just witness my mind, make my mind peace, I understand there is something anyone can do for people, communicate with people again, look and accept people as they are. d) What I changed? Stop making world fit to my style. Give up to keep everything. Everything will change. Separate emotion and thinking from consciousness. e) How that change is working out? Become peace, can make relation with people. Can think people. f) And what I am planning for the future Alexander Technique? Is study to surrender to body wisdom instead of making body fit to their thinking. I wonder if it is possible to develop some exercise to study as Alexander Technique. Some exercise is to study to surrender oneself to some wisdom (insight? Or one from one’s deeper place?) instead of making oneself fit to emotion or thinking using Alexander Technique as a indicator or support. My passion is to be instruments of insight. Difficulties I myself on the load to study. There is no guarantee to the result of study, especially in Japan it is so difficult to separate such study from brain wash. It may be better to use some more practical way easy to understand. That's all Best regards, Kyoko